Bad Homework

photo of Joe, a.k.a. Sophie by Susan Pittman

My homework was bad.
It was long and hard too,
but I’d heard people talk.
I knew what to do.

I found my dog Joe.
I showed him the stuff.
“Here, Joe!” I said.
All Joe said was “Ruff?”

I crumpled the pages.
“Fetch!” I told Joe,
but he sat by my feet
drooling, “Where did it go?”

I tore it to shreds.
I mixed it with stew.
I filled up his bowl.
I said, “Here, boy! For you!”

Joe took a good sniff.
He whined, then he beat it.
I had homework so bad,
my dog wouldn’t eat it.

© 2012 Elizabeth Ehrenfest Steinglass, all rights reserved

My Two Front Teeth

My two front teeth fell out.
I wiggled and I tugged,
Then I sold them to a fairy
For a nickel and a slug.
I waited and I waited
For my two new teeth to grow.
I had to be real patient
‘Cause they came in awful slow.
Now that they’ve arrived,
I think there’s some mistake.
These teeth are way too big.
I think they might be fake.
I need to call that fairy.
I know the deal’s been made,
But I liked my old ones better.
Do you think she’d make a trade?

© 2012 Elizabeth Ehrenfest Steinglass, all rights reserved

The Ants Invaded Kindergarten

The ants invaded Kindergarten
When we went out to play.
They ate our jelly crackers,
And they threw our plates away.
They sorted all the buttons
Into black and brown and not.
They must have moved the lizard
‘Cause he wasn’t in his spot.
They painted with the green,
But they seemed to use their feet. 
Then they used the toilet,
And they didn’t raise the seat.
We think they played pretend
‘Cause the hats were on the floor.
They used the wooden blocks
To make a village with a store. 
They changed the daily calendar.
Today’s now Saturday.
They pulled out all the alpha-books
And opened them to A.
They must have gotten tired
‘Cause when we came up the stairs
They all were sleeping soundly
In our cozy reading chairs.
The ants invaded Kindergarten
When we went out to play.
They seemed to have such fun,
We invited them to stay.

© 2011 Elizabeth Ehrenfest Steinglass, all rights reserved

The Monster in the Closet

There’s a monster hiding there—

Right behind that door.
And though it’s quiet now
It makes an awful roar.
It has a gaping mouth
That never needs to close,
And it can swallow anything
Even people’s toes.
But what is worst of all—
It never runs away
Because my mother lets it out
And helps it to its prey. 

© 2011 Elizabeth Ehrenfest Steinglass, all rights reserved

Ah-Choo!

On my way to the park
I felt a light breeze.
My nose sniffed a tickle.
I erupted a sneeze.
It must have been catching,
‘Cause right after me
Hundreds of birds
Got sneezed by a tree.


© 2011 Elizabeth Ehrenfest Steinglass, all rights reserved